ABOUT THE EPHERGENT
Reality Optional, Truth Inevitable
Founded at the nexus point of seventeen collapsing dimensions, the Ephergent emerged from the quantum static as the multiverse's only truly independent news source. While conventional publications limit themselves to one timeline and three paltry dimensions, our network of reporters traverses the full spectrum of reality to deliver news that exists in multiple states simultaneously.
OUR MISSION
To shatter the illusion of singular reality and expose the truth that lurks in the quantum foam between dimensions. We don't follow stories—we intercept them mid-probability shift.
WHO WE ARE
Led by our enigmatic publisher (who may or may not exist on Tuesdays), Ephergent employs a diverse team of reality-bending journalists, including:
- Quantum shifters specializing in paradox investigation
- Void nomads reporting from the edges of non-existence
- Chronofragments capturing news before it happens
OUR CORRESPONDENTS
EDITORIAL STANDARDS
Unlike mainstream dimensional media, we refuse to report on reality as a fixed concept. Our journalists adhere to strict guidelines:
- Facts are verified across a minimum of seven dimensions
- All sources must exist in at least three timelines
- Crystallized laughter bribes are accepted but must be declared
- No reality is privileged over another (except on Gravity Reversal Tuesdays)
CONTACT US
Neural-sync: cortex-feed@ephergent.dim
Telepathic hotline: Broadcast on frequency Theta-Zero-Nine
Physical manifestation point: The abandoned quantum observatory, Sector 7, behind the sentient cloud embassy
Warning: Attempting to contact our offices on days when time flows backwards may result in receiving a response before sending your inquiry. This is normal and should cause only minimal existential crisis.